Wednesday, November 29, 2006

The contrast and trapped in between

current state of mind: in the ionosphere trying to create a strand of nuke thoughts
the artist is the trapped muse
in between light and darkness
experimental click of a lens blackens the thoughts
the tormented figments of imagination
lips... calm, vision... stuck, blood... getting hotter
a tear drops and kisses the controlled smile......

Friday, November 24, 2006


The permanent temptation of life is to confuse dreams with reality. The permanent defeat of life comes when dreams are surrendered to reality - James A. Michener

Have i surrendered to the dreams i once saw with open eyes? With a spectre of sadness looming all over, why am i sitting wearing bright red? I am not a colourful person, and that is refuted by a lot of them around me. Adorning a colour so bright never made any sense. And neither does it now. There was a time, I remember, when hours were spent reclining on this chair in the balcony; I observed a lot of things, but none was registered. What was I doing then? Has there been a defect in my brain ever since the womb let me out? I thought so. At times, I still think so.

You know, this is not an insipid picture. Look at the wall, it is lit brightly, and the area that covers the boy is shining. It is not opulent but just bright. I have always liked that. But it is all behind me. (Smile) That is what people tell me, life is not that gloomy and dark. How do I look, I dont have eyes at the back of my head. Isnt it obvious that at times, I dont want to turn?

to be continued................


Why do i talk so often, to myself? Is it strictly apathy towards my so called goals in life or do i really dont have a goal in life? At times, the civilisation hails me as misfit... You should take that as a compliment, or so it seems. There is one way to look at things and there is ONE way to look at things. So, me being one is a good thing. Who tells me that? I dont know, it is something i wont use to bother myself esp when the glass of draught beer is empty...

Wait, isnt that the sound of Bob Seagal doing a cover of Metallica? Nice, or so it seems. Where did i pick up this line, guess, no i cant even guess this one. It happens to me so often i try and recollect what i did, when i did, how i did, from whom did i take the inspiration and to whom did i take it to. Now, with so many questions anyone can lose their head. Hmmm... Putting life in order.
To answer that:
Young un: i peed in my pants
then I became an adult (bade ho rahe ho so stop playing in mud and behave)
teenage: pimples determined how fast i was growing and how adult i was with more pimples, thats what the doon boy taught me. until i learnt he made me a ch*****.
high school: Science, thats the only option. girls, you have got to see priyanka dhawan man. oh prachi kaviraj. uppal's mam daugher is just so... just so.. just so.... these people couldnt go further, any further.
did someone forget that one needs to study? oh ya only IIT is where i look upto.
college: forget it
PG: dont even mention it
first job: i dont even remember it
second job: life of a wanderer
today: ???????????????????????????????/

why do we have questions? and why do we have to answer each one of them? why do we look at the past to help our future.
do we live in the past, all the time? It is like I am still catching up with yesterday, by tomorrow I will be ready for today! HAH!!!

surprisingly when someone sits with you and reminisces of all that happened and the days of yore, when we did that and did this and peeped inside the girls loo or when we were caught for sending cheesy chits to chicks, everything falls in place like a tale.
and then u remember all sorts of things.

It is like even trying to remember where did u learn that trick of shagging till long while lieng upside down. DId that come from Shaleen? Nah, Lokesh once discussed this in the open in the canteen. it was one of those days during one of those times. But did it work? acutally it did. you see the brilliant way in which u contruct the story it all falls in place. do bisexuals also have a say in that, as in a character? Psst... yes in everyone's stories. they just dont accept it.
So is it okay to be a gay or lesbian?
I dont know if everyone was straight when they descended on the planet.
No but is it okay.
How do i know?
What are you?
Bi-curious! Asshole, What breed is that?

Waiter, another draught beer.
So where were we? Bob Seagal? Guess apathy - i want to know the meaning.

Fuck it man! Gibberish!!!!

And, the moonstruck and the maniac finish the beer and back on the track to build another fucked up conversation in the air.

(utter gibberish, i know)

few interesting smirks that accuse genders

Men are like tiles; once you lay them straight, you walk all over them: Anonymous (actually someone i know but didnt want to quote her)

Men make women messy: Catherine Banning (Thomas Crown Affair)

The more i see of men, the more i admire dogs: Anonymous

Men are taught to apologise for their weaknesses, women for their strengths: Lois Wyse

A woman could trust me as long as her interests didn't run too contrary to my own: Thomas Crown

Men are all alike - except the one who you've met is different: Mae West

Men are my hobby; if i ever get married, i would have to give it up: Mae West

The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals. It's just that they need more supervision: Lynn Lavner (this one i totally love)

My lesbianism is an act of Christian charity. All those women out there praying for a man, and I'm giving them my share: Rita Mae Brown

Why is it that, as a culture, we are more comfortable seeing two men holding guns than holding hands: Ernest Gaines

If time and space are curved, where do all of the straight people come from: Anonymous

The radical right is so homophobic that they're blaming global warming on the AIDS quilt: Dennis Miller

two new blogs

1. this one deals with the news, announcements of every kinds. not news news i would say but something that would be of help to amateurs, novices, interested et al.

2. my love of the celluloid

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Good news; guess i am off to Tilonia now

New Community Radio policy gets Government nod

The Union Cabinet on Thursday finally decided to grant permission to non-profit organisations and educational institutions to set up community radio stations as recommended by the I&B Ministry and subsequently cleared by the Group of Ministers (GoM) headed by Sharad Pawar.
Apart from educational institutes, civil society and voluntary organisations, State Agriculture Universities, Krishi Vigyan Kendras, registered societies and autonomous bodies and registered public trusts can also apply for community radio station (CRS) license.
To apply for a license a non-profit organisation should have a proven record of at least three years of service to the local community and the CRS should be designed to serve a well-defined local community.
Individuals, political parties and their affiliate organisations, organisations banned by the Union and State governments as well as organisations operating with a motive to earn profit will not be allowed to own a CRS.
The Cabinet also authorised the I&B Ministry to finalise the terms and conditions and procedures.

this calls for some good work now. it isn't something that is new at all. there are successful stories of good community radio set up in Kachch, Orissa, Bihar and rajasthan
and even in tsunami.

let's see where it goes